When someone comments that they will pray for you, what do you say back? Even when I was a pretending christian I felt awkward when people said they would pray for me....

Two hands working can do more than a thousand clasped in prayer. - Anonymous

and another one I am pseudo-quoting since I can't find a reference at the moment........

Helping hands are far more useful than praying ones.

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I recently had an exam coming up and my aunt said "i will pray for you". I replied "thanks, i'll need all the luck i can get".
I've said this a few times to family - i dont know if they get it, but it makes me feel better :)
I believe it was Hitchens?? whose reply was.

"And I'll think for you."
That's a good one. Note to self to include that one in the future! Thanks for sharing!
I ask them not to. Its not going to do me any good, and to be frank, I find it slightly creepy.
c.

I politely say thank you and I will think for you.

Naughty Niko, aka Niko Theris.
Excellent.
I always say"don't pray for me, if you want to help me wash my car"
When someone says stupid things like that, I correct them, very clearly, by saying "Please dont. I am totally capable of handling the situation with my own intelligence and if the outcome is bad, I am still capable of dealing with it because I am alive and my brain is intact. But if you want to help, please ___(something that actually could help me)." NEVER miss an opportunity to educate and convince others of their obvious ignorance. OR try "praying is just talking to yourself. If you're not going to actually DO anything for me, dont bother praying. Its useless." or if you r the timid kind, just say "Prayers are just good intentions with no actions."
Them: "I will pray for you."
Me: "Why would you do that?"
Them: "Because the Lord...blah blah blah"
Me: *laughs* "How about you just give me a ride to the Emergency Room instead and we'll call it even."

A few people/family I know are pretty religious, and well intentioned, so for those, it's not worth the endless mindless waste of time getting into a discussion about it. If and when they tell me they'll pray for me I just shake my head and go "K..." and let it ride. The pretentious ones I'll often ask them baited questions to back them into a corner and wrap it up with a clear and precise acknowledgement that my low opinion of those who do that sort of thing in the face of action are wasting time and I have little use for their prayer nonsense.

In the last couple years, I've grown far less tolerant of their whole "wah wah respect my beliefs" nonsense and point out that I'm not just going to respect something by request, if they want my respect then they'll show me clearly why it's worth my time to bother respecting...who are they, anyway? I don't respect anything that's delusional and wrought with a history of psychotic instruction and destruction. Eventually they just shut up and leave me alone...which is what I wanted to begin with!
The hands that help are better far than the lips that pray.
--Robert G. Ingersoll [late 1800's]

I don't know of any earlier quotes like this.
You can say, "don't bother" or "thanks but no thanks". You can say, "OK" or "Thank you for keeping me in your thoughts". I like the last one because it rephrases what they are actually doing in a nonthreatening way. Most people, even the devout, understand that praying is BS. They are just saying this to be nice or because they don't know what else to say. If all that fails try "that is very nice of you but I would rather that you help with this..." This would be great for all of those people who say that when they don't know what else to say. When I was in the hospital, I didn't want a prayer, I wanted someone to pick up my dry cleaning!
Well, wanna kill two birds with one stone?

Just answer: Good! thank you! If I convert, then we will find out if prayer actually works!

When the offering goes in that direction, of course.

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