What do you say?

When someone comments that they will pray for you, what do you say back? Even when I was a pretending christian I felt awkward when people said they would pray for me....

Two hands working can do more than a thousand clasped in prayer. - Anonymous

and another one I am pseudo-quoting since I can't find a reference at the moment........

Helping hands are far more useful than praying ones.

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Permalink Reply by Jezzy on April 26, 2009 at 1:23am
I wouldn't say anything. I'd just be friendly.

When someone sneezes, you say "Bless you". what do you do if they sneer and tell you they're an Atheist? Surely you meant well. It's like when someone gives you a box of chocolates and you say, "omigod they have nuts in them, omigod omigod how nasty".

I have a great story about prayer though.

My brother was talking to an accountant, he was asking him about something and the accountant says asks him if he's tried praying about it. Of course, my brother gently explains that praying isn't really his thing, that he's not a religious man or anything. The accountant is like, "Okay, okay well that's fine. I want you to pray anyway, to whatever you want to, and then do the opposite of the answer you get, because you sure can't be praying to God".

I mean, this man was an accountant!
Permalink Reply by Allen Uribes on April 28, 2009 at 12:38pm
That is not unusual at all for Religious persons to be so condescending to those who don't "believe."
Permalink Reply by Karl on April 30, 2009 at 12:15pm
If its said to annoy you or in a condesending way then something along the lines of
'I really don't think some halfwit whispering to a ficticious sky fairy in the hope of being granted three wishes is going to be much use' usualy does the trick.
Permalink Reply by Allen Uribes on May 4, 2009 at 12:14pm
Oh I love it!
Permalink Reply by Tara Shriver on May 4, 2009 at 12:30pm
I feel awkward too when people say things like they will pray for me. Most people still think I'm a Christian so I am still at the just go along with it stage. They mean well. Especially when there is nothing else they can do. If someone you know is sick and dying all they can do is pray.
Recently a card went around at work for a mother that I work with whose little girl was really sick and it seemed she would die because the doctors didn't know what was wrong. I had such a hard time because I didn't know what to say. I wish that I could have prayed, wouldn't have mattered. It would make me feel like I was doing something though, if I were still a believer anyway.
Permalink Reply by Allen Uribes on May 6, 2009 at 6:10pm
You can still always offer your support and your empathy.

Just because you aren't praying for a miracle that will bring the girl back to perfect health doesn't mean you can't do something to help in one form or another. :)
Permalink Reply by SpaceCity on April 4, 2010 at 8:11pm
With this exact situation a few years back, we knew what my coworkers son had and I made a donation to a research foundation in his honor. He sai ibwas the only one to do so and personally thanked me fo it later and linked them to his sons website for others to do the same.

Being a person of action is appreciated in most situations, I think. Even in the face of cultural/religious/habitual formalities.
Permalink Reply by Brandon on May 6, 2009 at 8:39pm
Well i work at a grocery store in a little redneck town and everyone and i mean everyone is a christian. so i get alot of "ill pray for you" and "have a blessed day" and "you should come to my church" etc. depending on my mood and the persons attitude depends on my remark.

If im in a bad mood ill either look at them like they are stupid, or say im an atheist, or a no thanks im good. That kind of thing.

If im in a good mood and i like the person ill nod politley and say "thank you" or something of the sort.

But to each there own. It depends on how nice or mean you are.
Permalink Reply by Matthew F. on May 7, 2009 at 7:34pm
I'm with most everyone else. I say "Thank you..". There is no need to be an "Athiest Jerk" about it.

I will often tell christian friends "Our thoughts will be with you." when they have something going in. I see no difference and it is courteous.
Permalink Reply by Roger Austin on May 10, 2009 at 8:37pm
It depends on the context it's used, but for the most part I think the person that says it means well. I generally say "thank you" and go about my business. If I'm in a bad mood and I hear it, I might give a response of "And I'll actually do something useful" or "I'll think for you."
Permalink Reply by Hekate Moon on May 11, 2009 at 12:34pm
I usually say thanks. But if they know I am Atheist, I usually come up with a come back, like "you know it won't do anything, right?"
Permalink Reply by Laura B-G on May 11, 2009 at 7:19pm
I consider it nice gesture.
Both of my parents have died within the past ten years and I often think that people who have not been through painful trauma have no idea what to say. "I will keep your family in my prayers" etc. is one of the most common things that people tend to come up with.

Obviously, there is not one thing you can say that will actually help.

Even though I am an atheist, it really doesn't bother me - it doesn't call my identity into question to accept a genuine offer of kindness from another.

Of course, genuine is the operative word there.

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