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What do you consider "unfeminine"?
As freethinkers, we should be aware that just because a woman can beat you in softball, doesn't make her any less "feminine".
I came across a thread this morning on the topic, and the things the men listed irked me to no end. Examples: tattoos, cursing, smoking, being able to be her own auto mechanic, short hair, being drunk, etc etc etc. Now, I don't know about the other ladies of the A|N, but I personally love having tattos, cursing (within "reason"), and being drunk (though I rarely drink).
But what is femininity?
Men and women, I want your thoughts!
Tags: femininity
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Scott on -
I find it particularly unattractive for women to do things that a guy does purely to be accepted by guys. It just seems desperate to me...example...I was at a farm supply store picking up dog food and the girl ringing me up felt it necessary to drone on about how manly she was because she hunted hogs with pit bulls. Seriously....is that supposed to make her hot to me? How the hell did that come up anyway? My wife has been in a lifelong pursuit to try and be a guys girl immediately trying to bug in on any hobby I get to the point that I have to drop it and find something else to do. It's not that I don't want to spend time with her...it's just that I work hard to be successful in whatever I do and do not want to have to slow down to help her catch up to me. Example: Golf. She wanted to get clubs and golf with me...I have been golfing for over 20 years and have spend endless hours developing a fundamental understanding of the game and the rules (written and unwritten) and for her to up and want to start playing with little interest in learning just seems desperate and someone who is just trying to blab to her friends that she plays golf and not really someone who is interested in the game itself. That bugs me and if it happened would have ended my lifelong enjoyment of a hobby (BTW, I only golf about once a month if that now). I ride bikes...normally once or twice a week...and I like to ride 25+ miles any time I jump on. Now she wants to make that her hobby. I am encouraging her to find her own way...develop a hobby that she wants and not tagging on to mine. We will find time to be together but anyone honing in on someone elses good time purely for the purpose of fitting in is terribly desperate for attention and this applies to women who get tattoos (wife has one because I was thinking about getting one, but didn't), cursing (it's just rude anyway), smoking, auto mechanics (friend from high-school brags about working on cars all the time...she is single, still), ect, ect, ect.
Do I find women who play golf attractive....absolutely. Do I find Danika Patrick attractive, sure. Do I like women who can drive s stick cool...you betcha. Do I like chicks with tattoos....yup, love em.
Any women who plays "man" games and really wants to be successful is attractive. Not because they are doing it, it's because they enjoy it and do it for the game and not to portray themselves as hip and cool so guys will like them.
END RANT.
I hope I addressed at least 5% of your question. :)
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Permalink Reply by Black Magick Woman on -
Uh...About 5% yeah lol. I can understand your viewpoint, definitely. I've run into some younger girls who try to emulate the "guys girl", usually as a ploy to get said manly man. It's only attractive if what they're doing is just who they are, as opposed to who they're trying to be for some kind of gain.
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Permalink Reply by stephanie on -
i agree that everyone's ideas of "femininity" are different. what is feminine to men is often considered vapid and daft to some women. but that doesn't mean that that woman who plays softball or wears boots with shorts is any less "feminine" when it comes to loving or nurturing others which is considered "feminine" to men either way.isn't it all some vicious cycle anyway since men feel love and nurturing concern for their own clan members naturally? then they call each other "pussies" and "girls" when they see it slip. Then when a female plays a typical "girlie-girl" it usually entails having to be clueless, or incapable, or whiny. So, then i ask is "femininity" a good quality or a negative? and is "femininity" only defined by how well you dance on a pole or make cute coo-cooing noises during sex?
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Permalink Reply by Black Magick Woman on
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I do not coo-coo during sex, I moan lol! But that is a good question, are the perceptions of "femininity" and "masculinity" negative or positive? Do you want a manly man, a girly man, or a blended man? What about women? What about transgender or transexual people?
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Permalink Reply by Pansy on -
unfeminine?.... sitting on a toilet, sticking your middle finger at the camera.....bahahahahahah...... had to, i just had to :)
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Permalink Reply by Black Magick Woman on
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That's not unfeminine, that's fun!
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Permalink Reply by Prog Rock Girl on -
Hah, I didn't realize you were sitting on the toilet until Pansy pointed that out!
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Permalink Reply by Black Magick Woman on
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Hehe =)
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Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on -
Hahaha! I hope you threw in a few belches at the time of the photo, too. The cherry on top.
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Permalink Reply by Garrick McElroy on -
Overrated.
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Permalink Reply by Aaron S. (USA) on -
I think there are sort-of biological bases for what people consider masculine and feminine - like, in an ancient human society, and you've got to defend your village from the neighbors, it doesn't make any sense to send the women out to fight in hand-to-hand combat while the men stay home and try to breastfeed the babies. That doesn't mean gender roles are psychologically hard-wired, but I don't think it's a surprise, either, that there seems to be a lot of overlap in what different societies consider masculine or feminine territory. Gender roles just seem to be a product of our environment, to a large degree - in the USA, it's considered feminine to be concerned with fashion and to want to go out shopping for all the latest designer labels, but in Japan, for instance, these roles are reversed (since men there have a need to show off for their bosses or clients at work).
I was raised in a very conservative household, so that's affected the way I view gender roles, but then I don't see any reason why someone should have to hold to a particular role if they don't feel like it. Definable gender roles are optional to me.
When it comes to what I think is sexy, I haven't seen any really clear patterns along gender lines. Some of the sexiest women I've ever seen looked or acted very traditionally feminine, but on the other hand, one in particular I remember very clearly had shaved her head. I do seem to prefer athletic women, though - being able to see the striations on a woman's shoulder muscle is really, really sexy.
I also require razor-sharp critical thinking skills, but I don't personally consider either intelligence or stupidity to be gender traits.
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Permalink Reply by Jennifer Nicole on -
There are societies where men stay home and care for the children while the women do the hunting and like, actually. But in even in those societies, more emphasis is put on the importance of the male roles.
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