Trolls!

EDIT (Aug 4, 09): All of the links are now dead, so I am updating this discussion.

I feel we all need a reminder to STOP FEEDING THE TROLLS. I am very disappointed in how quickly you all have forgotten this little fact. I don't care that somebody is wrong on the internet. Leave them alone.

First, read Felch Grogan's excellent blog post on trolling, then read this:

9 Steps to Avoid Being/Feeding a Troll, summarized from eHow

1. "Avoid disagreeing with every single thing that is posted by other people." Balance it with positive comments and find ways to connect with the community.

2. "Don't participate in forums which are devoted to specific topics that do not interest you." This is like walking into a KFC and asking customers to join PETA - they will eat you alive.

3. "If you intentionally egg someone on who you know will cause trouble in return, you are a troll." The corollary of this is that just because someone else is a troll, that doesn't mean you're not one; only that the two of you are engaging in some hot troll-on-troll action, and nobody wants to see that. Ew.

4. "Don't initiate topics that have either been "beaten to death," or that are simply moot." Atheists are capable of morality, and theists think we aren't; and masturbation kills kittens. We get it.

5. "Don't start any topics which you know will cause a great deal of controversy for its own sake." A good example of this would be "Do Atheists Hate Gays?"

6. "Have a complete profile filled out for yourself on the site you are contributing to, and have at least some track record of making some positive contributions to the site." Don't show up with an empty profile and 10 minutes of site-browsing under your belt and expect to be welcomed without suspicion.

7. "Don't intentionally spread false information knowing that members will be inclined to correct you. Don't post generic trite sayings that serve no purpose." With each breath taken to fuel your typing fingers, you're wasting our oxygen.

8. "Remember the human." There is a real person out there reading and responding to everything you say.

9. "Understand that if a troll gets any response whatsoever to his/her postings, that will be enough motivation for him/her to continue." I don't care what he called your mama, don't leave him one tiny bit of a response, not even to call him a troll.

EDIT (Nov 24, 09): Since many of us possess a "troldar" that is prone to weaknesses, here's a handy guide to improve it:

How Can Troll Posts Be Recognized?

* No Imagination - Most are frighteningly obvious; sexist comments on nurses' groups, blasphemy on religious groups...

* Pedantic in the Extreme - Many trolls' preparation is so thorough, that while they waste time, they appear so ludicrous from the start that they elicit sympathetic mail - the danger is that once the group takes sides, the damage is done.

* False Identity - Because they are cowards, trolls virtually never write over their own name, and often reveal their trolliness (and lack of imagination) in the chosen ID. As so many folk these days use false ID, this is not a strong indicator on its own!

* Crossposting - Any post that is crossposted to several groups should be viewed as suspicious, particularly if unrelated or of opposing perspective. Why would someone do that?

* Off-topic posting - Often genuine errors, but, if from an 'outsider' they deserve matter-of-fact response; if genuine, a brief apposite response is simply netiquette; if it's a troll post, you have denied it its reward.

* Repetition of a question or statement is either a troll - or a pedant; either way, treatment as a troll is effective.

* Missing The Point - Trolls rarely answer a direct question - they cannot, if asked to justify their twaddle - so they develop a fine line in missing the point.

* Thick or Sad - Trolls are usually sad, lonely folk, with few social skills; they rarely make what most people would consider intelligent conversation. However, they frequently have an obsession with their IQ and feel the need to tell everyone. This is so frequent, that it is diagnostic! Somewhere on the web there must be an Intelligence Test for Trolls - rigged to always say "above 150"

ORIGINAL DISCUSSION (July 25, 08): Since this is an ever-so-slightly controversial website, sooner or later there will be trolls. (Brother Richard tells me there have already been some, which he did an excellent job of cleaning up.) But what to do about trolls while they are still here? De-conversion.com recently posted an excellent discussion on the subject. Here's an excerpt:

"What is a troll?

"A troll will post messages, often in response to honest questions, that are intended to upset, disrupt or simply insult the group.

"For trolls, any response is ‘recognition’; they are unable to distinguish between irritation and admiration; their ego grows directly in proportion to the response, regardless of the form or content of that response.

"So please folks. Don’t feed trolls. It’s not just wasting your/our time. It actually perpetuates and entrenches their very sad pathology. That’s not at all compassionate. Trolls need to go hungry if they are ever to find a cure. Please help them… by ignoring them."