Troll-A-Thon

The Nerd's post about Trolls reminded me of an old forum pastime that I used to love. The Troll-A-Thon! This thread is dedicated completely to trolling. No regular thoughts or real logic are allowed. Only Trollogic (®).

I'll help get it started.

[trollmode]

Look at this birth certificate! It's the one that Hawaii officials are trying to present as real! OBAMA IS NOT AMURKAN

Tags: fun, games, time, trolls, wasters

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Permalink Reply by Joey on August 8, 2009 at 12:51am
THE GOVERNMENT IS USING MATH TO CONTROL YOUR MINDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The evidence is all outlined here!!!!!!!!
Real scientists did studies on it, but the government wouldn't let them publish it. They want to hide the Truth!!!!!!!! Only one man is brave enough to tell the world about the conspiracy!!!!!
WAKE UP DELUDED PEOPLE! STOP BEING CLOSE MINDED! THE EVIDENCE IS RIGHT THERE!!!!!!!!
Fasco-liberal wikipedia tried to squash this information, but they couldn't stop the Truth!!!!!!!!
CLOCKS ARE A LIE!!!!!!
You lnazi liberals are using clocks to begin a new holocaust against us!!!!!

/troll
Yes, the guy at that website is serious. He's batshit crazy and pretty scary.
I've often considered liniking trolls to that page with "You know, this is what you sound like to the rest of us."
Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on August 8, 2009 at 4:24pm
I stand in solidarity with my troll botherin and cistern, meta and otherwise. You will linik trolls to that page over my dead body!
Permalink Reply by Jaume on August 8, 2009 at 4:31pm
More of the same here.
Permalink Reply by Johnsky on August 8, 2009 at 4:57pm
You guys know you're all going to hell right?

Here's 100% undeniable proof!!!
Just read (abstract passage from bible), that not proof enough? Well how about (another abstract passage from bible)!!!

Change your ways before it's too late!

Give your church lots of money so we can afford signs that say "God Hates Fags".

Do it! Or you're going to HELL!

... apparently.
Permalink Reply by Jaume on August 8, 2009 at 4:59pm
You Troll-a-Thonists are so LAME!!!

I miss the good ole days' really obnoxious trolls, who dared to post meaningless one-liners on top of a 3-pages long sig block stuffed with a bunch of misspelled (mis)quotes, a couple silly personal ads, and magnificent porn ASCII drawings. And noone of your sorry bunch thought about doing that here YET???
Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on August 9, 2009 at 12:47am
Elitist!
Permalink Reply by Фелч Гроган on August 9, 2009 at 9:09am
You mean like this ?

===

Subject: Tay vs Cockwekk BBBB & Menstruation Story
Date: Mon, 18 Apr 94 23:34:28 +1000
From: sera@elec.apana.org.au (Sedara Warrikk)
Organization: zuma

In article , dtay@fark.org.ma (David Tay)
wrote:

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Fark.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Fark.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Fark.

....[Several gigabytes deleted]....

>>Fark.
>Fark.

A
A
this reminds me of a funy menstruation story. all kk the other women
hav
posted theres so i fee;l i should post mine. pleas this is my first
post
i hav never posted before so please be kind to me i am a vegan && cat
lover.

it all began when my very hand-some and inteligent boyfrend JohnRuth
took
me out to a restront, the Stockton Diner, Palo Alto (SDPA). I ordered
Armenian Turkey in pubicly available academic sauces, while he
ordered a
hamburger. when his hamburger arrived he started licking the sides. i
asked
him what he found so apeeling about licking a pair of soggy buns with
some
smelly meat in the middle and he mentioned someone called Connie
Lingus. i
asked what he was talking about?????, and he mumbeled something about
licking
her pussi. well i was reely angri about him seeing another woman so i
desided
to look her up and giv her a peace of my mind LLLLLLLLLkk.

B
B

i got her adress from the fone book, and went over to her plase the
next
day. i called her a slut and tolled her not to let JohnRuth eat her
pussi
anymore and she started yelling at me. we got into a catfight and i
acsidentlly scratched out her uterus. now this was very embarasing
(but also very funi!!!!] but she started screeming veri loudely and i
tolled
her to shutup but she ignored me so i beat her to death but she kept
hitting me
anyway so i bit through her spinal column and stomped on her body
until she
was unrecognizabel as a human. but this annoyed the neighybours and
they
said they would call the police if we dide'nt keep the noise down and
i said """good i am a big fan of Sting'' so they cald the police and
the police
came &&&&&&&&&& nocked on the door. i quickly hid connie's uterus in
my
pantys hoping the police would'nt look their, but just then Connie's
severed uterous started menstruating!!!!!!!!!!!! butt it was too late
i had
already opened the door.

"" 'Allo 'Allo 'Allo what's gewing on 'ere then'' said the poliseman,
who was
English. ""Nothing'' i said ""Can i have your
autograph?????????????????????''

he was just about to do an internal body serch on me when he spotted
all the
blood all over the flore:"" 'Allo 'Allo 'Allo what's all this then''
he said
pointing to the blood on the flore. i pointed to connie's menses
trickiling
down my leg and said "" Im so sorry i'ts that time of the month''.
but the
other poliseman saw connie's remanes on the flore and asked what it
was,
and i screamed:

""AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHH.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGHHHHHHHH|
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHH.
MY TAMPON FELL OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and quickly
skooped

up connie's remanes and shoved them up connie's uterous.

""I see,, sorri to inconveniens you madam no further questions'' they
said
after i had sucked their dicks and threatened to sue them for sexual
discrimination the end.



"12: And Jesus spake unto the LORD thus:
`LORD, why hast thou forsaken me?'.

13: And the LORD replied unto Jesus:
`I LIcK PUSSI!!!!!!!!!!!!!
B
B
B
B'" - The Gospel According to Sedar, Chap. 69, v. 12-13
Permalink Reply by Jaume on August 9, 2009 at 9:49am
Almost. It lacks the porn ASCII darwins.

The formatting is close to perfect, though.
Permalink Reply by Фелч Гроган on August 9, 2009 at 10:02am
My apologies [NSFW]
Permalink Reply by JayBarti on August 9, 2009 at 4:40pm
My fellow Atheist I speak to you about the hidden nonatheists in our midst from the dawn of time, atheists have always been cat people I mean say what you will be everyone knows that cats at the very least atheists I mean its obvious dog spelt backwards is god I mean what are you obstuse.

I give you these quotes from fellow dogtheists because thats what they are in our midst.

LittlePants "DOG"
Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.
Dallas Gaytheist"DOG"
Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.
Blind Dog Willie Stone"DOG"
Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.
Even supposed cat person....
Stephen Goldin"DOG"
Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.
LittlePants "DOG"
Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.

I tell you they are a plague and must be banned from the site forthwith, I shall not budge, my belief is thus proved.Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.
Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on August 14, 2009 at 12:28am

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