This has been a very rich morning, with lots of intelligent, insightful, powerful comments. Thank you most sincerely. I feel like I am surrounded by wise, compassionate giants.

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Thanks Spud, I think you're nice too!  Believe me, not everybody thinks I'm so nice! ha ha.  If anyone has ever been mean to my kids, they have seen how not nice I can be!  Also, unforgiving.  I have never been able to forgive anyone for being mean to my kids. Ever.  I guess I'm overprotective, but, that's who and what I am.  I am always nice until someone is not nice first.  Then I can be mean too.  I am working on it, but I do have a temper.  I agree with you on the not paying attention to someone who is intelligent, but not nice.  I'm not going to listen to that.

I have no problem with someone responding to being attacked.

When I say being nice I do not mean being submissive or forgiving everything.  I do not mean being a yes-man.

See Spud, now you said that WAY better than I did!  You are right.  I do think I could maybe try putting myself in someone elses shoes occasionally if they are being nasty.  I tend to get mad quickly.  I need to step back sometimes, and see if what is happening warrants my anger.

When I was younger, I was way more diplomatic. Now I don't take crap. LOL

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