As weird as it is, I think it was the attitude of my former "fellow" Christians that started me on the road to doubt. Even though I've got a bachelors in Physics and have generally held a belief in evolution and big bang cosmology for most of the believing stage of my life, it really wasn't science that brought up questions(cognitive dissonance at its best). I think I've always generally never had a connection with anyone in any church I had ever attended. Mainly since most Christians, especially in the south, are non-intellectuals. But I think it really started when I began listening to extreme metal. I couldn't understand how anyone could look down on something that I loved so much and felt so natural to listen to. I can't tell you how many people have told me that its "the devils music"(even though most of the lyrics are socio-political).

Of course later on I did my research and discovered how ridiculous my former beliefs were. So who or what started you on your path to disbelief?

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i'm glad to see you made it to the secular side without worsening the depression. i have a neo-Pagan friend who's in the same boat; she told me she knows her faith is irrational, but that she clings to it because the idea of a world with no 'second chances' or benevolent spirits terrifies her. i'll show her what you said; maybe it'll help. thanks.

being shunned by my neo-pagan friends got me to be honest with myself; I didn't believe any of that bullshit.

I have a friend who is pagan, who admits to being irrational. But it makes her feel good, so it's okay for her to believe in it. I love her, but I admit to staring at her for a whole five minutes in silence.

Rachel, when I define the word rational as economists do, as referring to the benefits and costs that result from a choice, the only rationality I see in religion, especially xianity, is the kind that prevails in a dominant/submissive relationship.

One day about thirty years ago when I was still in transition, after a talk by a retired college professor I remarked that I wasn't comfortable with the superior/inferior aspect of xianity. His reply shocked me; he said "That's what I like about it."

Your pagan friend might be more rational than she knows.

Hm-mm, ask your neo-Pagan friend what she's doing that leaves her needing second chances?

She might be doing what an enterprising Catholic kid does, confesses a sin and then go out and commits it again.

Woot! Glad your free of the woo nonsense. I hope you get the best, easiest-to-live-with depression and anxiety treatment imaginable :) (Oh, and I hope it's affordable too!)
I've never had any serious doubts about religion being absolute bullshit.
God probably got the boot the same day as Santa and the Easter Bunny.
I did believe when i was younger, but yeah, santa and the easter bunny raised the initial question marks on god.
Maybe that's why my Christian parents never told me about Santa or the bunny...
I was introduced to a heavy dose of religion when I was about 12 yrs. old vis-a-vis the American Baptist church. What I got from it mostly was how "unworthy" of "God's love" I was. Oh, I tried my damndest to be a good Christian, rededitcating my life to Christ on several occasions. However, shortly after leaving home and joining the USAF the serious doubts started to creep in (the DEVIL doing his dirty work, no doubt!!). After a few years I became an agnostic and a few decades later it hit home, "Hey, I don't believe ANY of that shit!". So today, I'm an atheist and I'll most likely remain one until they stick my carcass in a box an drop it into the ground!
I was a skeptic child growing up despite being in Christian schools until I was 16. I barely recall an event my mother tells me every other Christmas. I was around 5 or 6 and asked her how could reindeer fly? No other non birds could fly...She said Santa feed them magic popcorn. I did not ask anything else, but I was not thoroughly convinced.

I never thought heaven and hell were real places, church bored me to no end, and the teachers never answered my questions without the usual "He works in mysterious ways bullshit." So the schools and churches made it quite easy for me since they were dumb as a brick.

It was not until last year though that I became an open, active, concerned atheist. After going through depression off and on for years, I ended up sending e-mails back and forth to a guy in Florida. When he was able to deduce my lack of self esteem just from letters on a screen, I knew I was not as bad off as I thought and started to download any book I could find. The first "atheist" books I read were " The Atheist Bible" and "Letter to a Christian Nation" which set me on my way to happiness. I stumbled upon Daniel Florien's Unreasonablefaith blog and he had a link for AtheistNexus, the rest as they say, is history.
The suffering of children first made me doubt.

Reading the bible sealed the deal.


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