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I'm trying to come out as an Atheist.My mother is very religious and makes me go to church every sunday and wednesday.My father who is divorced from my mother is christian I thought that he wasn't because he doesn't go to church.I still think he will be much more understanding than my mother.But it is a setback.Me and my mother and sister argue about religion,government and freedom alot.I think that she kind of knows that I'm atheist because we were in a arguement the other day and well she basically said that I'm not religious.But when I tell her I am more sure then ever she will make me talk to alot of people about it.She has been trying to get me and my sister baptised.My sister is religious but shy.The other day my some what friend who moved away came over and she started talking about religion and "god".She asked me if I believed in god and well I had to say yes then she asked if I was saved and I said no to try to give her a hint and she took the hint:)She now kind of thinks that I'm ATHEIST:)BUT now she is going to probably tell her mother who is friends with my mother.I didn't confirm it but they're probably gonna ask and if they do ask I will tell.They will be at my mother's church tonight.What a great place to confirm your atheism!If you do not see me on here then I told.

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Permalink Reply by Garrick McElroy on April 21, 2010 at 2:45pm
Good luck! It feels a lot better once it's off your chest.
Permalink Reply by faith the atheist on April 21, 2010 at 8:30pm
Thank you everyone for the advise.It didn't come to me telling my mother but my friend who is now my former friend.The other day we talked about gay marriage and religion.Now she figured out from my hints that I'm Atheist.She didn't tell anyone.But she isn't talking to me and said she won't until I'm christian and believe that being gay is wrong.Well all I can say to her is never gonna happen and we will never be friends again!
Permalink Reply by Jennifer Nicole on April 22, 2010 at 1:33pm
Gotta love how little tolerance these loving Christians seem to have. Does she really think her friendship is so special that others would change their world views to have it? >.X

You can test the waters by expressing some doubts as said above. Depending on how they react, you may be able to admit the truth or have to hide it until you're safely moved out of the home and more independent.
Permalink Reply by Dale M. on April 22, 2010 at 2:14pm
What's horrible is that people have to feel afraid to admit to not believing in a fairy tale character.

If god is brought up , you should be able to simply, politely say, Oh, I don't believe in God, and move on.

Hooray for you when you finally do it, not an easy thing to do.

If all the churchgoing atheists came out, we'd have to have a big party to welcome the crowd!
Permalink Reply by J.P.M. on April 22, 2010 at 2:46pm
Just get it done. You are at an age where you need to think for yourself and your parents need to respect that. Just tell them it doesn't change who you are or how you feel about them. You are old enough not to be told what to believe by anyone else. They should be thankful you have an independent mind and are capable of thinking critically. Do check back and let us know how it goes - especially if you have the courage to 'come out' in church. Good for you!
Permalink Reply by Kiru on April 22, 2010 at 6:07pm
Dealing with religious family members can be a pain, as well as having to shed off the pointless friendships with devote Christians. I say "pointless" in reference to what you just described - those who think you have to have the same views to be worth anything. There are plenty out there who are not so mindless. I fortunately didn't have to deal with a friend with such a bad attitude toward it, though he was still Christian. If he had been that type I don't think I would have wanted him around anyway.

If you do explain your lack of religion to your mother, it really depends on her what comes next. I've seen a huge variety of reactions. One in which a mother started screaming at her son. I myself have had to deal with debates, which I always had an upper hand in because as a religious person I had always studied quite hard. So when they wouldn't lay off, I'd bring their own devotion into question, such as by mentioning something that'd upset them (such as Judges 11:30-39, where a man murders his own daughter as a sacrifice to his "merciful" god) and as they refused to believe I was right, show them, and then ask how they could not have read that in all the years they were supposedly Christian. When they attack me, I get ruthless.

Funny enough, every one of them is no longer Christian.

The best advice I can give is to prepare for a battle of wits and endurance. Prepare with knowledge as to why you do not believe. Prepare by knowing their typical false arguments (ie. most scientists not believing in evolution) and giving them real sources where they can learn that what they've been told is a lie. And remember, anything that sounds fantastic, look it up and it'll likely turn out to be a lie started to make their religion seem more real. Ironically, the best source to know more about them are the church run sites that want to debunk them because they realize that lies will only harm their own image.

If you live with your parents, religion can be a real issue in the house. It's like some brain disease that causes family members to get stupid. But once the concept has settled in and no change is in sight, most will lay off enough to be livable. But in some cases I would have to say that denial really is the best option if you're stuck there. Unlike them, we do not believe in any being or sacred something which we can never deny. However, sometimes we just have to let our mothers know that we are our own people and will not be subject to their lack of reason. So if ya gotta, then do so strongly. Just remember to be ready to explain yourself. Why do you not believe? The easiest answer is... "why would I?" Like, why would you believe Poseidon rules the ocean? Why believe there are gods chillin' at the top of some mountain called Olympus? And a great question... Why believe in an absentee deity who needed blood from his own son's torturous execution to have any forgiveness whatsoever for his own creation when that deity has never shown up to show the love the bible so often declares he has for everyone? Pray for a person with AIDS to not have AIDS. Jesus said you'd get it with faith! Pray for a tree to wither. Jesus did it and said anyone with faith could do that and much greater things!

The arguments are many.
Permalink Reply by Rusty Gunn. on April 22, 2010 at 9:38pm
Do yourself a big favor, get out of that situation as FAST as you can. Do what it takes. Go away to college, join the service, get a job on the opposite coast, just get the hell out of there and live someplace where you can be yourself. You don't need that crap and you don't need those people trying to run your life for you. GET OUT!!
Permalink Reply by faith the atheist on April 23, 2010 at 9:47am
When I get 18 I am going to go to college far away and hopefully become a lawyer and move to California or New york.Where it is more secular.I can't wait to get out of Mississippi!
Permalink Reply by Shelby on April 23, 2010 at 12:56pm
About your former friend not talking to you till you think being gay is wrong: it's funny they are so concerned about other peoples sex lives. I know it's that 'it's my duty to save you' crap. But seriously, the dating pool is large enough that it's okay Bob is not into Jill and vice versa. If you have your mate then STFU. If you don't then you are barking up the wrong tree and STFU.

And if you are forced to church thing then just check out mentally. Put cotton in your ears and read a book. And make a bookcover that's says 'The Dummies Gude to not be brainwashed' or something like that.
Permalink Reply by J.P.M. on April 23, 2010 at 1:14pm
Funny, I just went to a Catholic funeral on tuesday - as a pallbearer, no less - and was really spooked by all the ritualistic incantations, invocations etc. I can't imagine people believing this stuff makes any difference to anything. But they came to this prayer "For everything there is a time, a time to sow and a time to harvest, (and on and on) ...a time for war and a time for peace, a time for love and a time for hate, a time to kill and a time to heal...
So I ask you, how did that shit get in there?? Isn't this the church telling their faithful that these things are OK provided they are done at the "right time". No wonder Christians have started so many wars.

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