I'm impressed!  The last time I saw photos of Jesus, he had long flowing locks.  Damn hippie!  Tonight I came home to this circular:

Almost trendy!  At least it's not a mullet!  

Jesus has really cleaned up his act.  A goatee would be better, but hey, this is 2013 and full facial hair is in again.  Plus, it's nicely trimmed, if full.

I remember reading somewhere, Jesus didn't really have the Tiny Tim hair style anyway.  Something about, being a carpenter, the long hair was in danger of getting caught in his band saw or power drill and then he would need to miracle himself.

Not sure of his ethnicity - Alsatian maybe?  

Well, at least everyone is smiling.  They all have nice white teeth, too!  Another of Jesus miracles, detailed in the book of Crest.

Then there's the 6-pack abs.  How did he get those?  Must be the fishing.  Hard work hauling in those nets.  I haven't had abs like those since I was 33.

Probably not the response the mysterious visitors wanted.  I wish they were here so I could discuss "Brad Pitt Jesus" with them.  He's much sexier than he was before his make-over.

Maybe next time.  I always think of the best thing to say hours, even days, later anyway.

Views: 2248

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

his followers are as annoying as post-Nazarine drip

That's cute!

Like Samson you brought the house down with that one.

Yes, and then my JW aunt told me about people like Simon Zealoteus. That was his name. Zealoteus. Well, how about Simon the Zealot?

It's interesting this topic has been resurrected.  Sort of like.....   let me see.....

Ooooo, oooo, tell me! Who?!

Dammit!  It was on the tip of my tongue, and now I just can't remember!

There is a serious point to all this: every generation and every denomination has seen fit to revise Chrsitianity to suit its needs and the current morality. The first to do this was Saint Paul, who changed Jesus's message of how to live a good life into a prescription for getting into heaven. The philosopher Kierkegaard put it plainly enough:

"In the teachings of Christ, religion is completely present tense: Jesus is the prototype and our task is to imitate him, become a disciple. But then through Paul came a basic alteration. Paul draws attention away from imitating Christ and fixes attention on the death of Christ The Atoner. What Martin Luther, in his reformation, failed to realize is that even before Catholicism, Christianity had become degenerate at the hands of Paul. Paul made Christianity the religion of Paul, not of Christ. Paul threw the Christianity of Christ away, completely turning it upside down, making it just the opposite of  the original proclamation of Christ"

I'm not at all convinced that "Jesus" was a real person....ever.  I think Saul/Paul invented him out of a patchwork of other man-gods that were popular in the middle east at the time....and his own damaged brain.

I think you are correct of all counts,sk8eycat. I had you a long reply on that devil Saul of Tarsus and Jesus too, but then my computer re-booted and I lost it.

Anyway, the Christians believe that the saint they call Paul was imprisoned after preaching about god and was finally executed along the Appian Way.I say that Paul pissed off a lot of people, incited them to riot, invoked his Roman citizenship, and was put under house arrest with a guard to protect him until his trial. After that we have no records of him. Outside of the bible writings we have no records of his either.

The story of Jesus is just the same. No records of a Biblical Jesus. He could have been invented by an epileptic Roman Pharisee with all of this falling into good hands about 323 AD.

I agree, Felaine.
I dont think he existed either. And the guy in the pamplet looks kind of dopey.

"One man died for all"

but at least he looked fabulous in the process

Who is this man?

Is he single?

What's his favorite episode of Simpsons?

Answers to this questions at (too lazy to write an actual address).

RSS

Support Atheist Nexus

Donate Today

Donate

 

Help Nexus When You Buy From Amazon

Amazon

AJY

 

© 2014   Atheist Nexus. All rights reserved. Admin: Richard Haynes.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service