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How old were you when you decided childfree was your default?

I was about five when I decided I'd rather raise kittens than children. Before that, I can't remember thinking anything concrete about bearing children. I know I was given dolls to play with, but there came a certain point when I was disappointed with dolls, and definitely wanted books instead.

At about nine, when a relative by marriage commented on how I'd make someone a good wife someday(because I'd baked gingerbread from a box mix), I retorted that I never wanted to get married. Their reaction was as if I'd suddenly sprouted horns, a forked tail, and my breath took on the distinct aroma of brimstone.

How about you?

Tags: childfree

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Prog Rock Girl on December 16, 2009 at 9:40pm

I have only one nephew right now. He lives on the other side of the world, though!

Permalink Reply by Renee Obsidianwords on August 27, 2009 at 6:43pm

I have similar feelings...the idea of having something in me growing...and then the idea of pushing it out...just freaks me out. I don't have a desire to grow something inside, like many women say they do. As natural as it apparently is, I feel it to be unnatural.
I am not sure your age Creature, but I just turned 38 and I have had my full of 'mommy stories'. All of my friends have wee-ones and I have had to endure each pregnancy and listen to birth stories. I have rubbed bellies, talked to bellies and sat next to my friends as they nurse their babies ~ all the time listening to them talk about how AWESOME it is. BULLSHIT! ;-)

Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on May 21, 2009 at 10:10am

Heh. I've heard there's no such things as a perfect wedding. I think I decided I didn't want to get married about the same time I decided I didn't want kids. I've never been into frilly dresses, and roasting-to-death in some scratchy, too tight piece of frippery just seemed like something out of the Twilight Zone.

Glad to hear your parents are o.k. with your decision to possibly adopt in the future. That's such a big hurdle for so many people.

Permalink Reply by Prog Rock Girl on December 16, 2009 at 9:42pm

I never had good romantic luck, so I assumed that I would never get married, and grew to never want to get married. Then my boyfriend needed a visa...

Permalink Reply by Femina Irata on May 18, 2009 at 8:45pm

I'm pretty sure there was never a time when I thought I'd want to pop one out. When I turned about 17, though, and started seeing all these girls I went to HS with having unwanted and unsupportable kids with these guys they hated, I was like OKAY BIRTH CONTROL NOW. I plan on getting surgically sterilised when I can afford it (or actually get a doc to do it!) and my partner is considering a vasectomy.

I don't have a problem with children, in fact, I rather like most of them. I remain open to the idea of adoption when I'm out of college, have a job, and only if my partner decides to do so. Actually, I had this fantasy when I was 8 or so that I'd grow up and adopt a houseful of little girls of every ethnicity. And hell, if I thought I had the patience for it, I would. But for now, I'm content with becoming a HS teacher and having a couple hundred screaming teenagers for only a few hours a week. :)

(I'm long-winded. Sorry.)

Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on May 21, 2009 at 9:27am

I'm all in favor of "long-winded" personal stories. It helps me get to know people better, which is why I'm on Atheist Nexus. I came here to meet like minds for potential socialization in person.

Kudos to you for being able to work with screaming teens.

Permalink Reply by Femina Irata on May 21, 2009 at 7:52pm

Oh, I haven't started yet. I just finished my first year of college, but I have friends who are teachers, whom I've been helping out in the classroom from time to time. So I've only got a little experience with commanding those damn adolescents, but from what I've seen...aaah, I can take 'em. :)

Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on June 28, 2009 at 10:24am

You are made of sterner stuff than me!

Permalink Reply by Whalehugger on May 20, 2009 at 3:20pm

I'd have to say that I've been what i would consider as childfree since I hit puberty. I never played house or being a mommy with dolls and the typical games little girls were supposed to play. I collected dolls, not played with them. I didn't like being around little kids, didn't like baby sitting, and certainly didn't like being forced to hold a baby cousin. As I got older, it was pretty much plain as day to me that I didn't want kids and don't particularly care to be around them. Thankfully, I found a guy who was as CF as I was.

Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on May 21, 2009 at 10:12am

I'm pretty sure I may have played with dolls before I started reading, but I don't remember that. There are a few pictures of me with dolls, so that could be proof.

Good to hear you have found someone who is CF as you are.

Permalink Reply by Celine Armenta on May 23, 2009 at 11:06pm

I was 11; I remember the precise place and time, 45 years ago. It was a kind of ethical decision, an insight. I realized that being a young kid is not that fun, because kids are rarely on control; because they don´t decide almost anything important; and because most people do not really like them. Older people make fun of kids, ridiculize them, do no respect them at all.
I like kids (and most kids adore me); kids deserve all my respect; and I respect them enormously. But, for a mother it is almost impossible to give such honest respect.

Permalink Reply by Little Name Atheist on May 24, 2009 at 1:52am

Good insight!