Partly because I'm sick of repeating them, but mostly to live up to my reputation as an arrogant, in-your-face doo-doo head, I present Felch's Laws -

1. "Atheist" and "stupid" are not mutually exclusive

2. Conspiracy = religion - god

3. You have no right to deride theism if you believe in unsubstantiated gibberish of your own


3 is necessitated by the failures of 1 and 2. Those that grow tired over nitpicking about Nexus' myriad shortcomings can get good discount holidays here.

Tags: -ism, -ist, believers, bullshit, crap, derailing, dumbing down, dumbness, faith, gibberish, More…hysterics, ideology, knuckleheads, noise, nonsense, stupid, stupidity, white males

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If I could draw, I'd be a millionaire cartoonist and probably assassinated by some crazy allah wailer. I can't. Anyone who can is welcome to take a crack.
Corollary to 3. the Relationship of Unsubstantiated Gibberish to Reality is inversely proportional.

Addendum: Owing to folding of space-time; the amount of Unsubstantiated Gibberish is not directly measurable and must instead be inferred. Consequently the estimated amount of Unsubstantiated Gibberish may be greater or lesser than the actual amount.


And in other News. Cern have announced they are looking at Unsubstantiated Gibberish as a possible candidate for Dark Matter.
Well, these are great as far as they go, but how are they supposed to keep the robots from rising up against us?
I am seriously starting a Felch Grogan fan club. You're a star, Felch! ;-)

Wow! Kristy, that's a YOUNG Jim Reeves! Do you know when that was filmed?
Wow. I'm impressed.

Usually I have an addition to offer.

But these are pretty complete.
2. Conspiracy = religion - god

I think conspiracism would be more appropriate here ("belief in the primacy of conspiracies in the unfolding of history".)

3. You have no right to deride theism if...

Technically, I have no problem with quacks being free to call other quacks quacks. I'd even tempt them in doing so: quackophony is a gourmet's delight.
I ran out of Nietzsche to read on the can.
So many Felch merchandising opportunities .... I can see Felch shops popping up in shopping malls across the country.
"That which does not kill me cripples me for life"

Somehow, I think the moniker Felch adds authority to these laws!

Oh - nice travel tip!
"Felch is God!!" -- oops -- nevermind .....
Who wants to be a Felch groupie?!

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