I've had severe clinical depression for almost a decade now. There are pills I could take to let me feel emotions, but I've been off them for a few years now. Is it possible to overcome major depressive disorder without having to take medication for the rest of my life? Has anyone else here accomplished this?

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Heh. Maybe. I went to a therapist for a while this past Spring, and it was the best experience I've had with one so far. I found her to actually be insightful. Unfortunately, she had to move away to a different job, so I'm not seeing anyone at the moment.

 

Also, the drugs I thought might help, haven't. I've been trying different combinations with no results. Right now, I'm taking Liothyronine, Bupropion, and I'm using an Emsam patch. I might as well be taking placebos.

 

I was also in a relationship for the first time. It was nice, but it's over now. I thought maybe it would work out, but I was wrong. She loved me, and I really tried to love her back, but it wasn't enough. I don't seem to be able to feel love at all. Lots of guilt, though.

 

I also learned that I don't like people touching me in any way. I though I'd enjoy affection, but I don't seem to be able to. Not even kissing or sex. I'm not sure if it's because of my depression, or if that stuff is just really overrated.

 

I still don't feel like a real human being, just a cheap imitation. I guess it's kind of funny when I look at it all from an outside perspective. At least I still have a sense of humor. That and I get to die someday, thankfully. I'm not in a rush, though. I don't want the people I know to think of me as "emo" or something, or be upset. I have enough guilt already. They don't even know about my trouble with depression. I'll just keep it all between me and the internet. Hehe.

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