Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by UUMom on April 3, 2011 at 9:37pm

As a Unitarian Universalist, I can be an atheist (30% of us are) and be in relation with Christians, Jews, pagans, and people of many other beliefs. Couples with different beliefs come to our congregations. It sounds like the original poster's husband is a fundamentalist Christian, but many Christians are not fundamentalist and some can change from fundamentalist/conservative to liberal. There's even an Episcopalian priest in my church who married a Unitarian Universalist. I don't think her beliefs are Christian, but he says his are even though he fully embraces our principles (he says he's a trinitarian and a unitarian even though they seem contrary, but he says it's metaphor) and he will not try to compell someone else to be Christian. None of the UU Christians try to compell others to believe the same way they do. I have met many other Christians who are the same (Quakers, even liberal Catholics).

I'm not saying that there are no fundamentalist Christians who try to convert you - there are plenty. But the atheist who does the atheist.about.com web site is married to a Christian woman and that's why he didn't go to the Godless American rally in DC in 2002, but I went. I emailed the organizers and got a message from the president, Ellenn Johnson at the time, and she said that even though I was a UU who considers myself an "agnostic" that I could go to the march, but she didn't want Christians there. The host of atheist.about.com protested because he couldn't bring his wife.

Just saying, not all Christians are the same and atheists and Christians can be married.

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by paul babcock on April 4, 2011 at 6:08am

If his theism isn't that big a deal to him, as you seem to be saying, then maybe it will be ok. I was still a deist when I got together w my wife and that turned out to be not much it a concern at all. Theists tend to believe their beliefs trump all others, (back to my thing, saving people from a burning bldg would trump most other concerns).

Another problem, I find, they tend to have is that as they believe it to be right to come to one conclusion w/o sufficient evidence, a particularly important and foundational conclusion at that, they then tend to come to plenty other conclusions way to quickly as well. Like the simple concept of "Idk" is somehow beyond them.

Only you know if your hubby has these limitations to a problematic level. And so only you can make this decision.

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by big_dan44 on July 5, 2011 at 3:08pm

My wife is Jewish and she simply cannot understand how I can be so "moral" without god. I've had another girlfriend in the past say that she "sees god in me" but didn't find it funny when I said "Well does that mean I should see a doctor?"

Some people purely equate morality with religion. Don't let it get you down. It can be quite frustrating, but luckily for me, my wife already had relatively older children when I met her. She was also very open about her children exploring other faiths (except for my lack thereof). So, I happened to avoid a very sticky situation as I'm sure she would not have been so open with me if we would have raised our own children. I just try not to think about what fights we would have had as it's rather depressing that these juvenile outmoded belief systems would have stood in the way of our love.

• ▶ Reply

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• 2
• Next ›
• Page