Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Atheist Andrea on July 30, 2011 at 2:06pm

Sometimes it isn't worth it if it is going to affect personal relationships, right?

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Permalink Reply by Scott on July 31, 2011 at 1:13am

Almost. But their religion is still my religion in their eyes. Kinda sucks when you have to live a lie...

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Permalink Reply by Sandi on December 27, 2011 at 8:54am

This annoys me that you are judged by what you are - especially by friends and family. Does their opinion of you change even though they have known you all your life as you are but to find out your a 'closet atheist', their opinion changes? Really what difference does it make. You are and have been the same person and they accept you for that but not if they find out you are atheist?

"Sometimes it isn't worth it if it is going to affect personal relationships, right?"

This hurts. It is shallow and disrespectful, but then that's religion. Sorry for you guys, I am glad you can come here and feel respected and not alone.

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Permalink Reply by Joy Cody on December 27, 2011 at 8:25pm

My brother and his wife are fundies, and I could see them not allowing my niece to have contact with us anymore if they found out.  Hell, even my husband's sister, who is a pretty liberal Catholic, has treated me slightly differently since finding out I was a non-believer.  My husband has never come out to his family, but he thinks they all know.  I'm out to all of them and my mother, but I don't want to lose my niece, so my brother and his wife can stay in the dark :)

And I agree that it's sad.  It's also a pain in the ass to have to listen to the Jesus talk and not speak my mind.

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Permalink Reply by Joan Denoo on April 21, 2012 at 10:18pm

If my sons and daughter, grandchildren and great-grandchildren were christian, muslim, or any other believer in a personal god I would especially want them to know I can find no evidence of god, or life after death, or answered prayers, or redemption for my sins, or the power of prayer. 

Every one else, family and friend, will either accept my decision or not and it really doesn't matter to me. I have no interest in converting anyone else, but if they impose on me I make sure I respond so powerfully with reasons I do not believe, they usually don't bring up the subject again. Except for my cousin's husband, who is determined he will convince me before he dies. He is in his 80s and believes I shall burn in eternal damnation. That belief is one of the reasons I hold my ground with him, he is afraid of the big burn and he doesn't need to be.  

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Permalink Reply by Erin K. Clark 17 hours ago

I dunno ... how personal can the relationship be without something like that out in the open? Coming out several years ago definitely showed me who my real friends were, and it wasn't always the ones I would have bet on. The family member who gives me the LEAST trouble for it is my Southern Baptist granny. She's ultra-religious but knows that family is an exception and she's never let her religious opinions affect how she treats her kids/grandkids.

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Permalink Reply by TNT666 on January 3, 2012 at 1:52am

Scott I think you would find great enjoyment and release if you found a local group of atheists to hang with once a week. Good luck.

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Permalink Reply by Jennie Devlin on July 30, 2011 at 1:30am

i am open about it to anyone who would ask, but no one does exactly lol having been a christian mostly all of my young life, i think a lot of people assume i still am, its just never something anyone ever talks about. not having made us very good christians LOL more we were because our parents told us to be yadda yadda... my childrens grandparents on both sides are religious and not to start any arguments i don't bring it up. they live with me and so far just raising them to know that people believe in all sorts of different things and we shouldn't judge (when I was 'christian' parenting) as well as helping them be open to everything has been turning out two very young atheists, to which i am greatly relieved :D  now that i myself am definitely atheist i find myself talking about it to them more, more asking them questions and starting conversations about different things...i guess a majority of our friends are either agnostic, or very poor christains, the kind that don't go to church or ever bring it up unless someone needs to be prayed for you know that sort of thing. i try to keep my comments to myself at those times. my boyfriends family is religious and knows we are not and that has been a semi-issue i would say.

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Permalink Reply by Atheist Andrea on July 30, 2011 at 2:07pm

If it is a semi-issue now, then I hope if you have children with him that you are prepared for some real issues. :(

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Permalink Reply by Nick on July 30, 2011 at 4:48am

90% it would hurt family members if I said it right out that religion is a fairy tale , I just say that I'm a total evolutionist and leave it at that . Once I had a extremely elated moment and could not stop my face from beaming when one of my work mates said we being made in the image of god " did I then think that god also looked like a monkey at one time " and I replied did he think god had a nose and a chin ? and he said yes "wow I was beaming " that means he had a mouth , did he then eat and I am sure there must have been waste ? and what about a penis ? was there then goddess or did he do it with mortals ? It made my week.

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Permalink Reply by Atheist Andrea on July 30, 2011 at 2:09pm

I sometimes avoid the subject by saying that I believe in the Big Bang Theory. It just helps keep the conversation at bay.

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Permalink Reply by Greg LeGore on July 30, 2011 at 7:27am

I'm starting to be less careful and more vocal about not believing in a god - esp. when people say stupid things such as 'God is Love' after a terrible disaster. The human existence throughout history has been so terribly random and bad things happened to so many people that there clearly cannot be a loving god or guardian angels protecting us. I'm especially vocal about the more militant people (politicians and priests/ministers) and churches who claim to tell us how to live, that they are superior and that they should have control over our lives. I am a bit careful around some family members because I don't want to lose the relationship with them and I'm not out to 'convert' them as they are me. Then so many of them turn out to be corrupt and truly bad people.

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