Hello, My name is Matt. I'm 21 years old. I live in Upstate New York, in a very rural area. Also, its very religious. We have alot of christian baptist fundamentalists around here, and my family is among them, and I was one of them. Now, I'm a proud Godless Gay Heathen! But my family isn't happy with any of that.


I'm a Librarian, a writer, an aspiring linguist, and an avid reader. I read so much of the Bible, that it became more and more impossible to believe and see it as a Good source of morality. Hence, I went superfundy to avoid it, then deconverted.


Been an atheist in denial from age 15-20. At age 19/20, I finally came to terms with the fact that I don't believe in any supernatural. I wanted to "believe" to avoid the question of death among other things. Now I see myself back then as silly.



How are you all? I'm glad to have joined you!

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What's the weather like down there?


We're in a pocket of New York that looks like its in the Bible Belt, complete with confederate flags. Redneck pride I guess. Poor, white, uneducated, and religious all describe it well. Though leave the countryside for some of the cities, and the demographics start to change quickly. Weird.

Sounds good. It must've been weird to not have extreme changes through the seasons anymore. We go from -5 to 90 degrees from winter to summer.

Hello, Matt, you Godless Gay Heathen!  I love that!  :)


I recently moved with my husband and kids from San Diego, CA, to San Antonio TX, which is on the edge of the bible belt.  It's not as religious of a city as they come, but it's religious enough to make me very uncomfortable here.  My kids have dealt with religious bullying because of their lack of belief and my husband and I are constantly confronted by tacky megachurch billboards and the like.  We really don't like it, and yet it's taught us A LOT about our own beliefs and desires. 


It's been difficult enough for me to come out as an atheist among my not-super religious family and friends, so I can't imagine coming out as gay AND an atheist among fandamentalists!  That's awesome that you've been able to do it so young.  Has your family had a harder time with you being an atheist or being gay?  Or to them maybe it's all related? :/


Hope life it going well for you!



It was easier for my mom to find out that I was an atheist. my family didn't like my being an atheist, but they took that far better than they took my being gay. Its another unnecessary source of tension between me and them.

It was actually an inbetween experience at school coming out. In high school, for a short period of time I came out as "bisexual" (because I thought it was more acceptable and gave me the option of dating women). Some didn't like it and stopped being my friend and even harassed me, and others just didn't care. Some of my friends just knew it all along.

I'm sorry to hear that it's been such an issue for your family and that some of the people at your school were jerks. :/  My brother is gay, too, and came out originally as bi (when he was maybe 19).  Thankfully, we (me, my mom, and my other brother) and his friends always had an idea that he was gay (and it doesn't bother us anyway), so I think it was a relatively easy process for him to come out.  My son (who's 7) gets teased at his school if he does something "girly," but since he has his uncle, he just really doesn't understand why someone would be made fun of for being gay.  He says "They act like being gay is bad or something!  It's weird."  I don't think he's gay, but I'm glad he has such an accepting attitude already.  He (and my daughter) have both decided they're atheists (without prompting from me) since moving to Texas, too, just because of how much meanness they've experienced coming from Christians.

I don't get it either, sorry he gets picked on for acting girly sometimes.


It's funny how people think the stereotypes are indicative of you being gay, like being a girly guy and all. My younger brother has both a lisp and can make a perfect "gay voice", and I can't. And I'm the one who is gay. I was also the one to play sports and stuff like that, my younger brother, forget it.

Yeah, I've known plenty of "manly" gay guys and plenty of "girly" straight guys (and of course the same goes for women).  Whenever I hear somebody call someone gay over something dumb (for example, for liking something slightly "girly" like prefering wine over beer) I always have to joke and say, "Ohhhh...so that's what gay means...liking wine.  I thought it had to do with being attracted to someone," or something like that. 
I for one welcome any converted godless gay heathens to our group. This is one place where you have a better chance of being welcomed than any christian group. Your family will likely not support you in your beliefs, which is one of the tragedies of religion, and one of the many reasons I rejected it around the same age you did.
Yeah. Its sad though, as otherwise great families get broken up all the time and destroyed because of religion. Christopher Hitchens was right when he said that it poisons everything.

welcome freethinker,


One mind at a time , right ?. Patience  and  eloquence and to say the right thing at the right moment .

To pause before speaking  and to actually weigh my words . Just conversation becomes challenging !

I am not on the barricades but hope to inspire many in my lifetime as well .

Congratulations on recognizing the world for what is is early in life , I  envy your determination at your current age.


AJ ( allmost halfway there at  48)






Other than being gay and a linguist writer it looks like I went thru about what you did and am also living in a sea if theists living in our bible belt as I do. And while I too am glad to have gotten to this point I look at my time as a theists as worse than merely silly and in fact rather disgraceful really and that it prompted attitudes involving seeing gay people as inferior somehow something I am very glad to have gotten past.

Also I too used to live in upstate N.Y., Watertown actually.

I was weird when I was younger, like at about 13, I'd avoid being around gay people unless no one else was around. Then I'd be really nice to them because Jesus loves everyone. Then I'd get afraid that the devil was tempting me because I was starting to think things (hint, subconscious thoughts becoming conscious). They were usually the ones I found cute.


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