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For Fun - Make Curse Words That Are Worthy Of Atheist Utterings

Most of us do it, and there are many forums debating the issue of atheists 'taking the lords name in vain', so no need to rehash it here, unless you seriously feel the need...
I still fall back on 'Jeezus Christ' and goddamn thisorthat when I'm really flustered, but I've become more creative when I'm feeling squirrelly...
Darwin Dammit...By the bones of Galileo...or heebie Jebus momma...I still like Fuckit the best

Tags: fun, stuff

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Permalink Reply by Prog Rock Girl on December 8, 2009 at 11:56am

I remember hearing "Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick!" when I was a kid.

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Permalink Reply by Goz on June 2, 2009 at 1:16pm

Another favorite for me is Bloody Christ on a cracker.

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Permalink Reply by Leslee Love on June 4, 2009 at 3:08pm

haha..me too!! :)

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Permalink Reply by Tarquin St John Sh'gn'sty on May 31, 2009 at 8:01pm

I recently picked up a few colourful insults from a rather earthy New Zealand female:

EG:

"mattress raping knob knocker"

My favourite is "c--twaffle" (I need to be REALLY cross to use this one it's the big gun)

However, I usually stick to the more innocuous EG:

"For Holy Elmer's Sake!" (explaining I'm a pwoud Fuddian)

or:

"I really don't give a flying flunngle"

Overall,I find sarcasm and ridicule more effective than coarse expletives.

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Permalink Reply by Sentient Biped on May 31, 2009 at 8:35pm

Good ol' Anglo Saxon 4-letter words have no substitute. Although, in most settings I am not able to use them freely, there are times when I tell someone "I can't say the word that came across my mind. It was not socially acceptable." As a consequence of holding it in, when I am in a safer situation I sometimes feel compelled to let go with a string expletives.

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Permalink Reply by Angie Jackson on May 31, 2009 at 9:36pm

Yes but what *I* want to know is: What on earth can I yell out in bed? "Oh Gooooood!" is a classic for a reason, yet know it's frankly a bit distracting. My cerebral brain kicks in when I least want it to reminding me that I don't believe in a god, and that if I believed in the one I used to, he'd be very displeased with me at the moment. It's annoying.

From ex-christian.net on a singles discussion: "I'm just looking for a nice girl to scream "There is no god!" in the sack."

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Permalink Reply by Leslee Love on June 4, 2009 at 3:12pm

I love using OHHHH GGGGOOOOOODDDDD!! There is nothing wrong with saying god while having relations of orgasmic proportions. I like to believe I'm 'frakking' a god. How awesome would that be!!! I mean, if a god does exist...I want to bang him. Fuck god...

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Permalink Reply by unholyroller on May 31, 2009 at 9:43pm

Right you are, Daniel.....as usual. One of my favorites is jesus tapdancing christ, and I do love the four letter expletives. However..this weekend my 11 year old granddaughter informed me that I use the F-word way too often and she "shouldn't have to listen to my cusses." LOL This from a kid who is drawing her own comic strip called "Willow's Comics from Hell. Guess I'll have to start using 'frackin crackers' when she's around.

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Permalink Reply by PigDiesel on June 2, 2009 at 6:13pm

My favourite for polite company is “Pants! ". If not in polite company I prefer “Monkey Butt Fucker or Monkey Butt Lovin " when I injure myself, I call people I don’t like " shit weasel ", for those incredulous moments I prefer " I'll be goat fucked ". 10 years in the Navy gives quite the colourful repertoire. And also some obvious bestiality overtones.

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Permalink Reply by Meggan Dominytus on June 10, 2009 at 1:45pm

I haven't heard monkey butt lovin' in quite a while :D

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Permalink Reply by Sylvia on June 4, 2009 at 6:05am

It actually happened to me before, that someone who knew I am atheist said something like "ha, but for swearing you still use god/hell/jesus/blah". Well, yes, I do. Like using any word of my language, I can still use those words. In a context of widely known sayings (full of a lot of nonsensical stuff anyway) it would be more awkward to replace them. The words are part of my language and using them does not mean you are religious. So why avoid them? Be afraid to burn my tongue or what? Or be afraid to hurt someone's feelings? It is almost like they go "now that you are atheist, you lose the privilege to use the names, because we own them". Granted, someone invented god some thousands of years ago, but it is the invention that is least likely to be claimed copyright on ever.

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Permalink Reply by bryan on June 4, 2009 at 2:25pm

Had already appropriated "Jack Abramoffing" for masturbation-looks like it's making the rounds.

I'm not discipilined enough to get away from "Goddamn!" when I'm mad- too plosive and satisfying.

I like "Christ on a bloody cracker" quite a bit-will practice that one a bit and see how my X'n friends deal with it when they bring up Rush Limbaugh or that ilk of ueberturds.